Heartbeeps

When I was a kid, I subscribed to a science fiction magazine called Starlog. Starlog tried to cover every sci fi movie and tv show that was coming out. So in one issue, you could have an article about a great movie like Escape From New York followed by an article about a lackluster effort like Space Raiders. That being said, I made it a point to try and see every movie that Starlog mentioned. One of those movies was 1981's science fiction comedy Heartbeeps.

I remember being really excited about seeing this movie. I'm not sure why. Maybe it was because I was a fan of it's stars, Andy Kaufman and Bernedette Peters. Anyway, I had the opening day marked on my calander. I thought it was strange that there was no ads on tv for it. And no articles in other publications, just Starlog. When opening day arrived, it never showed up in my local theaters or in surrounding theaters. I was pretty bummed. A few months later, it finally popped up in a small town theater about 20 minutes away. I thought that was strange, but me and some friends who had no idea what this movie was, went to see it. I think I sold them on it when I told them that Latka was playing a robot. After the viewing I might have had a few less friends.

Kaufman and Peters play robots who meet at a factory while awaiting repairs. Val Com, Kaufman, is a valet while Aqua Com, Peters, is a hostess. As the two stand and wait, they talk and get to know one another. Something strange happens as the two develop feelings for one another which leads to love. They decide to escape the factory and start a life together. Catskill, Jack Carter, a robotic insult comic, joins them on their escape. While on their quest to start a life together Val and Aqua build a baby robot they name Phil, making them a family.

Hot on their trail are two factory workers, Randy Quaid and Kenneth McMillan, and a law enforcement robot named Crimebuster. Crimebuster is the size of a tank and has a shoot first, ask questions later mentality. Val and Aqua also face the problem that their batteries won't last forever, and if they don't find an energy source, their new lives will end.

I have a real soft spot for this movie. I think it stems from my anticipation of seeing it as a kid. It definately has it's flaws. There's some points that just drag. With a really short runtime of 78 minutes, this shouldn't be the case. There was a writer's strike that occured halfway during production, causing a halt in shooting. That could be a reason for it's pacing.

Kafman plays Val like he played Latka on Taxi. With Kaufman being the kind of entertainer he was I was expecting something a little different. I have a feeling that the studio persuaded him to do it this way. The only reason he took the part was because Universal said that if he starred in this that they would finance his dream project, The Tony Clifton Story. When Heartbeeps bombed though, the plug was pulled on Clifton. Kaufman was so ashamed of this movie that one night on David Letterman he offered to redeem the ticket price to anyone who saw it. Letterman joked that it he might need change for a $20.

Sigourney Weaver was actually the first choice to play Aqua, but her agents talked her out of it. Peters is good, but I'm kind of curious to see how Weaver would have played it. Out of the human actors, Carter fairs best as the wisecracking Catskill. It's the actual robots that steal the show. Phil was the first real robot built for a movie. And it's fun to watch Crimebuster blow up everything in his path.

The main thing that really works in this is the makeup effects. Created by the legendary Stan Winston, his work earned the first ever nomination for makeup at the Academy Awards. It lost out to An American Werewold in London, rightfully so, but Winston gave an amazing look for the robots that would be duplicated in the years to follow.

This was directed by the great Allan Arkush, the same man who gave us Rock N Roll High School and Get Crazy. I think his hip sensebilities might have not been a good fit for such family friendly fare.

I remember introducing this one to my daughter when she was younger, and she enjoyed it. It's not a great movie, but as far as family films go, you could do a lot worse.

It's available on dvd.