Car 54, Where Are You?

Have you ever watched a comedy that only has one big laugh, but that laugh was so big that you wish the rest of the movie was that good? That happens to me everytime I watch 1994's Car 54, Where Are You? The scene involves Officer Gunther Toody, David Johansen, having sex with his wife, Rosie O'Donnell, sounds scary, I know. Anyway, as he is about to climax, he yells out, "Ooh, Ooh," as a homage to the late Joe E. Ross who originally played the role back on the classic 60's sitcom. That's it...the only laugh. And me describing it I know doesn't sell it.

Car 54 was made during the time when a lot of classic shows were getting big screen makeovers. The film centers around the lazy, doesn't follow the rules Toody, and his new partner, the by the book officer Francis Muldoon, John C. McGinley. The two get assigned to guard Herbert, Jeremy Piven, whose about to turn over evidence against a mob boss Don Motti, Daniel Baldwin.

I really want to like this movie, but it is a mess. It was directed by Bill Fishman, who also did one of my favorite films Tapeheads. I also like most of the cast. I'm a big Johansen fan, but he almost tries to hard to fit into Joe E. Ross' persona and his over the top mugging almost gets obnoxious. McGinley fares better as the straight laced Muldoon. They also bring in original cast members Nipsey Russell and Al Lewis to play older versions of their characters. Plus the film is full of hip cameos from The Ramones, Penn and Teller, and Tone Loc. One scene is even shot in the legendary punk club CBGB's. Even the film score was performed by the great Pray For Rain, who also did the music for Sid And Nancy.

So why doesn't this work? I think the film might too cool for it's own good. You don't take a hip director and cast and put them in an update of what was a classic, but kind of square, tv show. Also Car 54, even though it was a classic, isn't a well remembered series. I know it pretty well since I watch a lot of late night Me TV programming, but most people today probably couldn't even name one episode.

There were a lot of issues during the production as well. Fishman originally envisioned it as a musical. Kind of strange since the original wasn't. All of the musical numbers, except one that Johansen does at the beginning of the movie, were cut. The Johansen one is kind of strange too. It's a dream sequence complete with him singing and dancing around with animated animals. Even with the musical numbers cut, the studio insisted on even more edits, making the movie even more incoherent. The film was originally shot in 1990, but it sat on the shelf for five years. Some of this was due to the studio's, Orion, bankruptcy.

Car 54, Where Are You? is a bit of a mess with one big laugh and a lot of groans.

It's available on dvd.